The Roost has a post up today about being a leader which led to a discussion about parenting. I am amazed by people I see that do not parent their kids. I see them parent when it fit in with their schedule, but I do not see the consistency that kids need. My husband and I were having a conversation last night about this... after I had relayed stories about the lack of parenting. "I may not always parent correctly, but I always parent." I mess up all the time. I attending many seminars and read many 'self-help' books. Consistency is the key... my son just came downstairs (and it's early) usually he grabs a book, but instead I heard the sound of the Wii... In our house the rule is no Wii during the week - period. So, all I said was, quietly was... No, Pepe. No fuss, no tantrum... he just turned it off because that was the rule. Kids will always try to bend the rules, but once a rule is in place it is set. Now, if I could just get them to flush the toilet :)
What strategies do you use to parent? Is it consistency? Punishment? Rewards/Priveleges? Do you have a book or a seminar that you've found particularly useful? Let me know...
4 comments:
aaahhhh....i am the worst parent to give out advice. i should have disciplined my kids more, or said no more often, but i am so guilt ridden that i felt bad when i would do those things...onto better things, i finally have you added on my blog list (thanks to britnee!!!)....i think that you seem like a wonderful mom....
I think my biggest strategy is "consistency". Just as you said - a rule is a rule. There are no changes to relax a rule for any kid. And there are no tantrums in this house because I NEVER give in to that behavior - EVER.
I've read no books or taken any seminars. I hear suggestions from other parents and take what I like. I just fumble my way through it.
and for flushing the toilet - after years of yelling and griping - we tried a different approach. After a flush and hands wash the kids were rewarded with candy. (a few skittles, m&m's, marshmellows - whatever was on hand.) 6 months later it has worked like a charm for Buttercup, who ALWAYS flushes now and wants candy....but for Jammin' - still slips his mind. The candy isn't reward enough to tempt him.
I thought we were the only family with kids that don't flush...makes me feel more normal! :)
Well consistancy used to be the norm around here....now I'm failing being a single mom....way too many video games for Josh and I feel badly. Well you do what you can do and pray a lot!
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